by Jim Fannin

A loser…

1. Complains about conditions, circumstances and situations
2. Whines to anyone that will listen
3. Puts other people down in order to build himself or herself up
4. Seldom (if ever) accepts responsibility for their actions
5. Pivots away from criticism and usually strikes back
6. Prepares poorly because of over-confidence
7. Evaluates his or her poor performance with emotion and blame
8. Acts like a victim when things don’t go their way
9. Embellishes the truth even for no apparent reason
10. Often outright lies for personal gain
11. Acts selfish
12. Has an inflated view of themselves
13. Has their ego run their mouth
14. Very seldom has compassion for the less fortunate
15. Always expects to get his or her way.
16. Pre-frames performances with psychological safety nets as in “I won’t have a chance with the officiating in that ballpark.”
17. Readily showcases anger or outrage when they are criticized
18. Tries to get other people to defend their ways
19. Surrounds themselves with “yes” people that always agree with them
20. Doesn’t learn from past mistakes
21. Takes unfair advantage of other people
22. Has language that is boisterous and self-serving
23. Carries a “holier than though” attitude
24. Looks down on lesser people in stature, economic status, or social standing
25. Forces their physical presence on others
26. Loves to hear the good about themselves
27. Judges strangers immediately upon meeting
28. Counts his or her money obsessively
29. Takes advantage of the opposite sex
30. Categorically labels groups of people other than himself or herself
31. Uses shock value to get attention
32. Has marital or relationship challenges
33. Overtly demanding of subordinates without seeing or feeling how they feel
34. Can hold a grudge
35. Flip flops on previous opinions to fit the situation, condition or circumstance
36. Uses foul and or vulgar language to “shock and awe” and showcase power
37. Wields sarcasm to protect fragile ego
38. Seldom asks great questions because they already know the answers
39. Has a short attention
40. Expects to be waited upon
41. Tries too hard in pressure situations
42. Seldom makes non-emotional adjustments during a performance
43. Gets off the subject in a conversation to confuse others and deflect further attention away from the subject at hand
44. Procrastinates because they know they will pull it off
45. Intimidates and frightens “significant others” with comments such as “No one leaves a relationship with me…”
46. Reacts violently if “significant other” tries to end the personal relationship and gives the impression all friends and family are in serious danger
47. Constantly showcases his or her accolades, accomplishments and honors
48. Takes action at the wrong time
49. Offers excuses when things don’t go his or her way
50. Oversteps their authority in most situations

By Jim Fannin

In life you are either a pioneer or a settler? In this usage, pioneers are usually among the first to an area. They lead the way. Settlers, on the other hand, arrive after first settlement and join others in the process of community. They follow.

As I reflect on my heritage, I recall Kentucky tales of the pioneer and adventurer, Daniel Boone. Daniel Boone was an American pioneer, explorer and frontiersman. His exploits during the late 1700’s made him one of the first folk heroes of the United States. Boone is most famous for his exploration and settlement of what is now the Commonwealth of Kentucky (my home state). This territory was then beyond the western borders of the settled part of the 13 Colonies. Despite some resistance from American Indian tribes such as the Shawnee, in 1775 Boone blazed his Wilderness Trail through the Cumberland Gap in the Appalachian Mountains from North Carolina and Tennessee into Kentucky. There he founded the village of Boonesborough, Kentucky, one of the first English-speaking settlements west of the Appalachians. Before the end of the 18th century, more than 200,000 Europeans settled in this general area by following the route marked by Boone.

Are you a pioneer or a settler?

A pioneer mentally is adventuresome. It is daring and bold. With a dream under their arm, the pioneer marches into the unknown to find his calling. This person is without worry or anxiety regarding the obstacles they might face as they chase their goals and dreams. A pioneer spirit uplifts, motivates and inspires everyone they meet. With blinders in place, the pioneer forges ahead in the face of adversity. They seek a better place regardless of the sacrifice. Time, money, hardship and effort are the currency paid by the pioneer in reaching their dreams. The pioneer awakens each day with a need to achieve. There is purpose in each pioneer’s step. They cut down the psychological safety net that comfort the timid, fearful and weak. The pioneer has a “go for it” attitude. They dare to go where others seldom imagine. Are you a pioneer?

A settler tills the land once it’s been discovered. They set up shop. They settle in to daily routine. They hop a ride on these habits and adapt the mind of peaceful existence and co-existence. They take far less risk. They wait for things to take care of themselves. They react to what’s happened. They settle for what’s sure. They settle for what’s there and seldom expand their boundaries. It’s the settler that loses the need to venture out. They avoid confrontation. Although they may be good at what they do, they seldom are great.

Sometimes a settler quits dreaming. Once this stops, they “settle” for what is and seldom venture into what may be. Like the settling of the foundation of a house, it can turn small cracks of discontent and apathy into big cracks of despair and hopelessness. Now the mental and physical edifice, built over time, begins to crumble. The thoughts of shoulda’, coulda’ and woulda’ prevail. Do you settle with your current physique? Have you settled in your current relationship? Have you settled in your job or career? Are you a settler?

There’re two things for sure. In the future you will either be better or worse. It’s the pioneer that will accomplish the former. Stop settling! Put on your coonskin hat and forge ahead. Be the modern day Daniel Boone. Pioneer your dreams.

Be in the Zone!